We got our 1st tardy this morning, and I cried. Not about the tardy. I know that won't matter in the long run. But, to me, it was like a glaring symbol of "The Bad Mommy". I could be mad at my child for taking her sweet time this morning making us have to drive instead of walk. I could be mad at the other parents in the parking lot who seemed to be taking their sweet time parking and backing out which made the line extremely long this morning. But, I'm mad at myself. Why? Because that's what I do. No matter how prepared I try to be by packing everything up the night before. No matter how much I coach and fuss and persuade her in the mornings about hustling. No matter how much I try to remind myself that this is a one time thing and it won't happen again. I'm still mad at myself thinking about what more I could have done.
But, why? Why do we so that to ourselves? Are we gluttons for punishment? Sometimes we have to learn to roll with the punches. Take the good with the bad and realize that life's little "oops" moments don't define us. When we mess up it doesn't necessarily define our character. It just defines our actions. And thinking about that makes me smile. It reminds me that God gives us second chances. He knows that we mess up, but He forgives us and still loves us. And that same gentle love and forgiving spirit, we need to have with ourselves in whatever little mess up we have. Thank you, Lord, for another lesson!